In a rut
I am in a rut right now...an "I don't want to do this anymore" kind of rut. This is not the first time this has happened. When I mentioned to Derek that I should be allowed at least 3 breakdowns a year, he informed me that I had probably already hit that mark this year :)
When I have a "breakdown," it is more of a shut down. I stop doing laundry, stop cleaning up in the kitchen, eat out more than normal, and basically sit on the couch or playroom floor while my children play around me, crawl all over me, and bring me book after book to read. As a mom and a believer in Christ whose true hope comes only from the Lord, though, I have to pull myself out of these ruts. How do I do that?
I turn on really loud music in the kitchen and dance and sing my heart out with my boys.
I LET myself have a few days of that shut-down mode. The laundry and dishes will wait, and my husband is amazing at helping pick up my slack!!
I blog and try to use my trials and difficulties to encourage others :)
I go to the Desiring God sermon archives and search for a message that applies to what I'm going through and am very often amazed at how God points things out to me and speaks through John Piper and others. I listen, I read, I pray, I journal...
AND I throw caution to the wind, fill up my bathtub with water and almost every toy car we own, turn on the jets, and let the boys go absolutely nuts. The noise and mess they make drives me crazy for almost the entire time they are in there, but if there is ONE thing that seems to get the energy and need to be really loud OUT of my boys, it's a crazy bath time. (Or really, now that I think about it, maybe the crazy-loud noise level in a jacuzzi bathtub filled with 3 boys makes the normal-loud noise level of 3 boys running around the house just seem a little quieter in comparison?!...)
One more thing I love to do when I'm in a "rut..."
Take pictures of my kids. Somehow, even a child who has been acting horrifically all week can look so adorable when I see his cute smile captured with a camera. One day, I will look back, laugh, and miss these days.